• Try to connect to dial-up ISP
  • Braap, snap, crackle, disconnect
  • Curse my ISP for their funky modem pool
  • Try again - same result
  • Lift handset to listen to line - line is very bad
  • Mentally apologize to ISP
  • Go into rage over poor service from telcoheads
  • Stomp around house cursing Aliant and all their shareholders
  • Notice four-legged pal Que is looking guilty
  • Notice other four-legged pal Pita is sniffing telco jack
  • Rub hand over wet sticky telephone jack
  • Curse more (gently now)
  • Apply alcohol and hair dryer to telco jack
  • Connect to ISP
  • Laugh at myself and think kinder thoughts about telcoheads